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Old 01-04-2006, 02:13 PM   #1
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Animal Smiley 049 Scared Child

I don't know if anyone else has or have had this problem but any advice would help.
I have a 5yr old, 3yr old and 10mnth old little boys. Well the middle child is especially afraid of dogs. He will look and play with a dog as long as its through a cage, gate or fence but other than that he is terrified of them . However, my wife and I want to get a family dog. We are planning on bringing home a brand new baby girl Yorkie in a few weeks (right after Valentines Day). Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas as to how to get my son used to the idea of a dog of his own in the house, that he should not be afraid of?
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Old 01-04-2006, 02:16 PM   #2
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Don't they have child rescue where you live? LOL

Honestly, I don't think small children and small dogs go together very well. It always seems like both the dogs and kids are miserable about something most of the time.

Wait till they all get a little older (and wiser).
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Old 01-04-2006, 02:29 PM   #3
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welcome to yt!
I would strongly suggest that you reconsider having a yorkie as a pet with children that young. I have 3 kids too and we had labrador retrievers(still do) when they were young. Accidents happen very quickly even with well behaved, supervised kids and yorkies don't escape disaster as easily as some of the larger breeds.
I would suggest letting the 3 year old interact with other, well mannered dogs and other critters (friends, familys, neighbors) from a safe vantage until he exhibits a desire to get closer. How does he feel about movie pups(101 Dalmations, Snow Dogs)?
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Old 01-04-2006, 02:52 PM   #4
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Hi! Welcome to YT. Have you already purchased the puppy? If so, you will have to make extra provisions with regard to your 2 younger children being around the pup. My son was 5 when we got Chewy and he was totally prepped about what it meant to have a small dog and given the rules, no touch, no riding, etc... He got it and was perfectly cool with it all. Your younger ones won't understand and I would definitely not leave the dog unsupervised with your 3 year old. There was a story on here recently where a lady had her 2 year old running in the yard with her yorkie. The 2 year old fell on the yorkie and unfortunately, the pup died. It can be that quick.

I think actually having the pup around your 3 year old will help. All it is is taking the fear away. You could do that by giving him a job to take care of the pup - maybe letting the pup lick the nutrical off his fingers or letting him help pour the food.

Good luck with your new pup and just make sure to be careful
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Old 01-04-2006, 03:12 PM   #5
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Has there been a situation where your 3 year old was scared? It doens't have to be dramatic, like an attack, just one where he was surprised by a dog. My great nephew is terrified of my yorkie (he's 3 and a half) and Tucker has never done anything to him, but the jumping up on his leg with his front paws just freaks Luke out for some reason. Being around the pup with positive experiences is probably the only way to cure him, but your kids are very young to be around a little dog. Would you consider a larger dog? Either way, good luck!
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Old 01-04-2006, 03:23 PM   #6
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Personally I'd wait until the 3 year old is over the fear of dogs before purchasing one. Have 2 Yorkies and they are high maintenance and high strung (Lots of energy). I'd be affraid the new puppy would really give added stress and anxiety to your 3 year old.

On the weekends you can take you children to the SPCA and they allow you and the children to interact with the dogs. Between the SPCA visits and the parks I think this is a avenue to get the kids comfortable around dogs.

Think sometimes people think if the dog is smaller than the child than the child won't be as affraid...Wrong, The smaller dogs even though smaller have a bigger attitude. ;-)

We have 2 yorkies and 2 children but before bringing our first Yorkie home our children were already animal friendly and dog socialized. A new puppy in the home can add stress but when you also add a child who has a fear of dogs this will add stress and anxiety to the house hold.

Please don't think you are being ganged up on.. Many of us have been right were you are now..We are just try to save you the parents from have to go through preventable stress and anxiety.

Best of luck,

Wish you the best of luck with your decision.
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Old 01-04-2006, 03:25 PM   #7
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I considered a larger dog but unfortunately we cannot have large dogs and as many of you have said I think positive experiences with a dog will really help. Again he will play with a dog through a fence or gate but out in the open. He has never had any bad experiences that I can recall. I think the more he interacts ands gets older the better he will be.
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Old 01-04-2006, 04:05 PM   #8
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Hi MightyDior,

I too was VERY afraid of dogs when I was young. I got bitten by my aunt's German Shephard. Actually, I am still a bit afraid of dogs (Big ones) if they are not on a leash. Now that I have Baby though, (had her for a little over a month), I am not as afraid of bigger dogs. Do any of your friends/neighbors have friendly dogs that your child can visit with? Also, Yorkies usually stay fairly small. Maybe your puppy won't be as timidating? As for the Yorkie/Children mixture...if you are set on a Yorkie, just have them be careful with the way they handle him/her. They are very delicate and get broken bones very easily. Usually the first thing a child wants to do is pet and pick up a puppy. Good luck!
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Old 01-04-2006, 04:18 PM   #9
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Hi, MightyDior. I am in agreement with Stacy (Sylvan)..My neighbor's son is 3 and has lived here for a year. I have several Yorkies all ages, colors, sexes and sizes and there is NOT one that he is NOT afraid of. We have worked with his parents who want to take a large rescue when the time is right but Matt is deathly afraid. Only ONE time have I even considered letting one of my Yorkies go to a home where there is a young child(you know who you are-LOL). The small dog to smal child is a recipe for a disaster IMO. And, when the child ages to like 6-7 what kind of doggie police will the kid be? I ask this because by that age they have playmates who come into your home to play. Either you crate the dog when the kids are there or carte the kids when the dog is out.
Talk with someone who has a very laid-back dog that would let you work with your child and the problem. BUT, I would NEVER bring a dog into my home with a very scared child. Reminds me of throwing a kid afraid of water into the pool. Sheer Terror and a lifelong phobia can result.
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Old 01-04-2006, 05:23 PM   #10
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Welcome to YT. I have a 3 year old son myself, who used to be scared of dogs. He got used to the neighbor's dog first when we moved, then we got our own pug, and then a yorkie. He has grown up with a cat for most of his life, who he was wonderful with. So IMO if a kid has been around small animals his whole life he should be fine. He never pulls on ears or tails, unlike some of the kids I have seen. But all kids are different and only you know how well your children behave and listen to your directions. Any time other children come to my house I do not allow them to hold Brandy, they can sit and pet her under supervision.
If your kids haven't been around small animals and don't know how to treat them right I would choose a much "sturdier" dog. A "bigger" small dog, more than 10 lbs. Pugs and beagles are great family dogs that stay small. Yorkies have very small bones and are so fragile. Also, there is a small possiblity that a yorkie(and other dogs) might try to "nip" at your child if they hurt them. For that reason I would recommend choosing a dog that would tolerate kid's playing better. It sounds like you have lots on your plate with 3 kids. A yorkie is like a another one, they are a high maintence dog compared to others that need daily brushing and I take mine to a professional grommer every 6 weeks. They are also well known for taking over a year to potty train.
Whatever you decide I hope that your family and the new dog ends up really happy. Yorkies are beautiful and great little dogs, but they are also time consuming, fragile, and take a while to housebreak. Just make sure that you put alot of thought into the type of dog that will fit perfectly with your family. You might want to try a breed recommender like this one: http://sy.adiho.com/ASA/Controller?a...=33&appid=9901 I am glad you joined this site and are doing research. Good luck!
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Old 01-04-2006, 08:00 PM   #11
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Yorkie temperament is similar to that of other terriers – this little dog not only wants to be in charge, it will be in charge. Nothing sways it from its self-appointed superiority, not a Great Dane or a Rottweiler or a wimpy owner. He can be scrappy with other animals, manipulative if not trained, and stubborn. Poorly-bred Yorkies can also be snappy, territorial with food and toys, and hard to housetrain. For these reasons, Yorkies are not the best choice for a family with babies or young children.

Yorkies also need more daily care than most terriers. Although it doesn’t shed much, the long, silky hair will tangle and mat if not properly brushed. Diet is important; soft foods can exacerbate problems with already weak teeth and gums.
http://www.canismajor.com/dog/yosiau.html

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Old 01-04-2006, 08:02 PM   #12
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Our cousin's daughter was TERRIFIED of ANY dog when she came back to Texas...around 3 years...she's 5 now. She would literally shriek and shake at the site of a dog...have her mother to thank for that one.

ANYWAY, in-laws kept her quite often and they slowly introduced her to their bird dogs out side. Then, we gave them a deer chihuahua and she finally got use to her. It just takes time and a lot of work.
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Old 01-05-2006, 04:51 AM   #13
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I have three children - 12 yrs, 7 yrs, and 3yrs old - all girls. hehehehe None of them are afraid of dogs in the least regardless of size. They get along so great with both my dogs it's just hysterical to watch, especially my youngest with Matthias. However I used to do in-home daycare a long time ago. At that time I had a cocker spaniel - the sweetest boy. One of the children was afraid of him. He never did anything to the child, mind you, but the child was deathly scared of all dogs. To accomodate, I had to keep my cocker confined to the upstairs until the boy's parents found him another suitable daycare.

The worst thing to do to a child is to force them in to a situation that is already traumatic to them. Personally, what I would do is slowly start introducing your son to smaller sized dogs. Like maybe a friend has one. First through the kennel, then the playpen, then explain "Ok, the doggie is on the leash now. See? I have him. Would you like to hold the leash too?" Yorkies are high maintenance and to introduce a Yorkie puppy - or any puppy - to a home with a terrified child is not, in my opinion, responsible or smart. That dog is gonna pick up on that child's fear and someone is gonna get hurt.

I know the desire to have a dog in the house, but you have to put your children first right now. Perhaps your child will outgrow it. But if he doesn't, what are you going to do? Are you gonna live forever with a scared child and nervous dog, constantly watching over your shoulder to make sure one doesnt' hurt the other? Or are you gonna bring this dog in the house, hope it works, get your and your other two children attached to it, and then find a home for it because of the stress? That's not fair to the other kids OR the dog.

Try getting a toy dog - a stuffed one, or one of those mechanical ones that are remote controlled for your son. Let him get over his fear properly. Please don't put him through more stress than he probably already goes through naturally as a three year old. This is a critical time in their developement already. He doesn't need more added to it. Let him come in to his own. If you want professional advice, talk to his pediatrician - see what she says about the fear and the possibility of him getting over it and whatnot.

These are just my opinions. I just hope and pray you do what's best for your son and this puppy you have in mind. God bless.
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Old 01-05-2006, 05:33 AM   #14
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Bridget, an excellent post. As I read that I remembered a woman and her son at the state fair. The DNR was there with a snake. Dad was making the child reach toward the snake-he was worse than terrified. Then, the mom, same thing. It was so painful to watch 2 humans being put thru agony. This sounds similar in my mind..
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Old 01-05-2006, 05:41 AM   #15
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Well, a child looks to his parents to protect him from what he is scared of, especially when they are that young. Having a parent force you in to a situation you are already terrified of just hinders that child's trust of the parent. I remember vividly being about 5 or 6 and terrified of slides. My father took me to the park and made me go up the slide with him. i screamed and cried but I was forced to go. My dad promised me it would be ok, that I would have fun, that i wouldnt' get hurt. He sat me down, gave me a push, and I fell over the side. To this day, I have a fear of heights that you wouldn't believe.

I would just hate for any parent to jeapordize their relationship and trust with their children over something as trivial (in the grand scheme of things) as a family pet. Try to see if there is a different pet the child might be interested in.

I'm not trying to be nasty or rude, so please please dont' take it that way.
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