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02-08-2011, 02:35 PM | #1 |
Senior Yorkie Talker | So frustrating So, my friend has a beagle that she and her b/f got kind of as a "next step" in their relationship. She did the same thing with another b/f only to break up and abandon the poor dog. So, needless to say, I wasnt thrilled she did it again, but tried to be supportive. She calls me all the time, at all hours to ask me questions about Bailey (the Beagle) bc I've owned dogs my whole life. Not that that means I know much. Haha! You never stop learning. I have even been to school to become a vet asst and still I learn something new everyday. She did the same thing with the other pup too. So last night she called and told me that her b/f told her he wanted her to move out. I said, "what about Bailey?" She just nonchalantly said that she didn't know bc she wouldn't be able to take her and so she would have to give her up. I understand that there are times when people do not have a choice, but most good owners try everything else first. It makes me so angry. I feel like she just plays house and I tried to tell her nicely before that she shouldn't get dogs to see how her b/f's would be with kids. I see my dogs as my babies and I would find a way to keep them. She shouldn't have gotten a dog if she wasn't up for the responsibility. Of course I had a feeling it would be this way bc she did no research on the breed and purchased from a byb. I'm just so annoyed but really want to try to keep my mouth shut bc she is a good friend. Guess I just needed to vent. I know its a little off topic. I just don't see how she can act like she loves this dog so much when she can give her up so easily. They are like children and a huge responsibility. Maybe I am over reaccting. |
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02-08-2011, 03:16 PM | #2 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: May 2010 Location: Delray Beach, FL
Posts: 7,984
| I don't think you are overreacting at all. Unfortunately some people don't view dogs as part of a family and really don't even know that dogs have feelings. It's unfortunate that your friend may never know and honestly I hope she doesn't get to find out. It must be hard for you to consider this person a very good friend, yet you are on completely opposite ends of the spectrum on this issue.
__________________ I'm Karen - Devoted Mama to the Drama Boyz - Cooper & Max www.alldogboots.com |
02-08-2011, 03:32 PM | #3 |
Senior Yorkie Talker | It is hard bc I want so badly to tell her off but at the same time we have been friends for about 11 years. If it were anyone else I wouldn't be as kind. They do have feelings and they love you so much. They don't understand why you are abandoning them. She shouldn't have made such a quick decision getting a puppy w/o having a plan for a situation like this. The are not toys and they are not disposable. I don't know how to nicely tell her how I feel. I've tried before. |
02-08-2011, 03:34 PM | #4 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Manhattan Beach, CA
Posts: 1,635
| You are not overreacting at all!!! I get so mad when I hear about people doing this or people who have a pet and then have a baby and decide that the pet is too much now that they have a baby. I know someone who just put her cat out on the street once she had a baby, she said it would find a new home. Uggggggg
__________________ Ronda & Teddi ** PPU - Petite Pups United Member ** The PINK Club Member ** |
02-08-2011, 03:37 PM | #5 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Southern California
Posts: 611
| That's horrible! I know she's your friend but she does not deserve to have pets until she learns how to be responsible. |
02-08-2011, 03:41 PM | #6 | |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: South Florida
Posts: 8,008
| Quote:
Now..if you tell like it is she may get mad, it is hard to hear the truth. This could effect your friendship, but if you don't it is going to bother you and it will happen again. You have to weight which is the better choice. Good luck....
__________________ Shinja mom to Remy lil Sis to Bailey and Sammy | |
02-08-2011, 04:00 PM | #7 |
Senior Yorkie Talker | I had a parrot, a dog, a rabbit, and a cat when I was pregnant with my first. Now I have a parrot, 2 dogs, a rabbit, a cat, a 1 year old, and am pregnant with my second. I think if I can do it, she sure can. I have been trying to come up with the best way to talk to her about it bc it will bother me and it will happen again. She wanted another puppy a few weeks ago! Ill just have to tell her and hope she doesn't let it ruin our friendship but she can't keep doing this. It isn't fair to the animals involved. Our animals are part of our family. It may make things like moving a little more complicated but we manage. We are moving overseas soon and everyone will be going with us. We are getting a bigger vehicle to support our growing family as well. We are not rich by any means but our babies and furbabies always get what they need and then some. So it angers me that she acts like she can't find a way to keep her bc she works or will have to move. Millions of people work and move and take their pets. As for having a baby and giving up ur pet, that's ridiculous. My son loves our pets and they adore him. Not to mention they keep him busy. Haha! The same will be for our second. |
02-08-2011, 04:02 PM | #8 |
Crazy about Kacee! Donating Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Kansas
Posts: 21,173
| I would tell her what I think of her actions. Actually, I couldn't call someone like that "friend".
__________________ Karen Kacee Muffin 1991-2005 Rest in Peace My Little Angel |
02-08-2011, 04:06 PM | #9 | |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Rockport, TX, US
Posts: 119
| Quote:
If you don't speak up, your feelings will eat at you and that's not good either. | |
02-09-2011, 07:37 AM | #10 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Southern California
Posts: 611
| For the sake of her next victim, please tell her!!! |
02-09-2011, 07:51 AM | #11 |
YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: Deer Park New York
Posts: 1,586
| You have to tell her how you feel, in my opinion she is totally self centered and I don't know how you can be friends with someone like that. I don't say all my friends have to love animals the way I do but someone who does this to their animals would not be my friend for long. |
02-09-2011, 10:26 AM | #12 |
No Longer a Member | There are ways to tell her gently...I'm not nice enough to know those ways, but I'm sure someone who is really great at voicing their opinions without hurting others feelings (too bad anyway) can chime in. I love animals too much to be friends with someone who sees them as disposable as boyfriends. |
02-09-2011, 01:49 PM | #13 | |
Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 31
| Quote:
Hopefully you can find a way to bring this up with her, but she might be defensive b/c I'm sure she knows deep down that she's just being lazy. If she just put in a little effort, she could easily find a place that allows dogs and make it work with her work schedule. I work 9-5, but thankfully doggie daycare is only $15/day. She can always take her pup to one a couple times a week if she has to stay late at work. | |
02-09-2011, 02:35 PM | #14 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: South Florida
Posts: 8,008
| [QUOTE=QTQuinn;3422761]I find this statement ironic! Isn't it a little hypocritical to judge a bf on how he would be with kids through a dog, yet she would abandon one just b/c of a breakup? Good point about the judging of the boyfriend. So if someone was judging what type of parent she would be by abandoning two dogs what would that conclusion be?
__________________ Shinja mom to Remy lil Sis to Bailey and Sammy |
02-09-2011, 06:45 PM | #15 | |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Washington
Posts: 837
| Quote:
I would agree dogs have feelings and that's the part I have a hard time with breeders/show people. More times than not they keep a dog for a few years (that dog has bonded to them) until it's outlived its usefulness/breeding capabilities and "rehome" it to make room for a new and younger breeder. That dog is no less cast aside than any other dog "rehomed" (sounds better than "dumped") for any other reason.
__________________ Kendra | |
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