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08-25-2008, 11:34 AM | #1 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Virginia
Posts: 124
| Shy yorkie Hello everyone, My little Mollymae won't have anything to do with me. She loves my husband, but runs behind the sofa. I have to do everything for her; brushing, bathing, feeding. It hurts my feelings and this has gone on for a long time now. My husband is not at home a lot, but she will wait for him and is all over him when he comes home. He works all the time. Sometimes I feel like I could sell her because I clean up the pee and poop and do everything for her. Does anyone else have this problem. It is like I don't exist to her. He has been gone working for the weekend and she did sleep in bed with me, but I have to pick her up and she still tries to run away from me. I am thinking it is because I have to do the bathing and everything else, which she hates. Any info. would be appreciated. Jan |
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08-25-2008, 11:43 AM | #2 |
I Love My Yorkies Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana
Posts: 37,147
| How old is she? Do you take her out for walks, play with her, give her treats? Another good way to get her to bond with you is buy practicing teaching commands to her with treats. I bet if you just give her lots of love and attention she will come around. Now I do also have to tell you mine also go crazy when my Husband gets home. I think that is normal
__________________ Chachi's & Jewels Mom Jewels http://www.dogster.com/?132431Chachi http://www.dogster.com/?132427 |
08-25-2008, 11:48 AM | #3 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Virginia
Posts: 124
| Shy yorkie Thanks so much for replying. I love her to death. When I can get her to come to me I love on her and give her treats, but she will wait until I put food down before she comes up to the bowl. I have to walk away to get her to eat. I have two other yorkies. Male and female. She has even taught them to run behind the sofa. I know this sounds crazy, but she is the tiniest, but the ring leader. My male adores me and Abbi Rose female loves me. It just hurts that Mollie Mae doesn't. She is so adorable. Everyone has a fit over her because she is so personable with them. I have never neglected her in anyway. I think she hates me because I bathe and brush her. My husband only loves on her, so she runs from me. Jan |
08-25-2008, 12:06 PM | #5 |
YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Hanford, CA
Posts: 4,895
| gosh that has to be difficult. Sit down on the floor and have her come to you. This is what I did when I first got Suzi. Sitting down with your arms open is not a threatning gesture, and she will feel more at ease. Talk to her very softly and pet her and praise her as much as you can. Build up the trust between the both of you, she will love you too.
__________________ "No matter how little money & how few possessions, you own, having a dog makes you rich." |
08-25-2008, 12:09 PM | #6 |
Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Sand Springs, OK
Posts: 78
| Jan I can definitely identify with your situation and it's devestating! Gidget was MY birthday present from my husband, but since he was home (retired) and I was still working - he is the one that bonded with her. I would come home from work and pick her up from his lap, sit down with her in my recliner and she would immediately jump up, walk across the top of the end table and hop back into his lap. It did get better believe me. As she got a little older, she would snuggle in with whomever was sitting down. At night, she would go back and forth behind my bent knees and then behind hubby's bent knees. There were times I would sit and cry because I wanted that adoring look from her and because she only had eyes for her daddy. Give it time - perhaps he should start doing some of the things that you think cause her to run from you? Good luck and it will get better I promise! Kathy |
08-25-2008, 01:40 PM | #7 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Virginia
Posts: 124
| Shy yorkie Mollie is 3 years old. I took her for a ride with me and loved on her and she was okay, but when we got back home she still ran behind the sofa. I gave her a treat and she took that and then after her treat she ran away. I do have Cody and Abbi who love me, but my husband took Abbi out of town with him and I have a feeling when they get back, she will be his also. My little male adores me. I just wanted Mollie to love me because she is so adorable and takes to everyone except me. Even my friends. Thanks for the replies. I am not giving up though. Jan |
08-28-2008, 12:05 AM | #8 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: arizona
Posts: 77
| I am thinking that perhaps you are trying too hard. What I mean is that (as you probably know) Yorkies are highly sensitive and intuitive to our every feeling. They know when you are feeling something strongly, yet, someetimes they can't interpet exactly what you are thinking. You could be scaring her simply by focusing on her , intently and expectantly to see how she will react to you. She will pick up on your dismay at her being shy of you, this will scare her. My "biscuit was a nervous, shy, little guy at first. I love him so deeply and I would pre-anticipate his every move. i watched him closley to make sure he was alright, eating Ok, pooping OK, the intense attention, mixed with my constant concern for him only made him more afraid. When i noticed that he was acting more comfortable when a friend would walk in I realized that it was not so much his problem as it was mine. I relaxed, I would play with my other dogs , on the floor, and I just ignored him if he was hesitant. He slowly started coming up and I would casually glimpse at him and say sweet things but then I would focus on the others. He would see that the other dogs were getting all kinds of attention, fun and treats and soon he wanted me to pay attention to him. I would a little at a time. I would always act casual . another thing to remember...if you are upset when doing the bath, or brushing, because you are worrying that she will not like you, she will feel this upset and start to act just the way you are worried about. Be confident, happy and fun when giving her a bath, letting her know that you are having fun. She will start to feel secure with you and then you two will bond. "Biscuit" and I are inseperable! I love him sooo much and he is a confident , loving baby. Yet, still if I am worried about him, and start to look at him too much he will get shaky and act scared. I then pick up a toy and divert the attention and he immediately forgets about it. I know it sounds crazy but you might try this. Patti |
08-28-2008, 05:54 AM | #9 |
Slave to My Rug-Rats Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Long Island
Posts: 7,247
| There's some books you can get: Help for my Shy Dog |
08-28-2008, 12:59 PM | #10 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Virginia
Posts: 124
| Shy yorkie Thanks to everyone for the replies. Patti, I think you nailed it on the head. Thanks for your info. I am very very nervous when I bathe or brush her because I know she hates it. She has been watching me pet the others and she does seem somewhat different. Thank you so much. Jan |
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