End of OUR leash!!! Please help a desperate mom of a out of control yorkie

[yorkfamily]

Hi everyone first thread..I will tell you about our Lola Belle. We adopted her when she was 1 1/2 she had been kennelized her whole life..she was an "undesirable" as she had longer back legs then the desired tea cup puppies..I was told she was kennelized to keep her from being breed..as part of my contract with the breeder we had her spayed but only after she had gotten to know us..at the time it was just my husband and I when we brought her into quiet house she seemed tramatized and catatonic..she had not only been kept in a cage but outside in a barn with dozens of other barking terriers..she had no will to play or get up or even look at us..and all we wanted to do was desperatley love her..it took months for her to warm up to us..she then started to follow me around our house we tried every method to house break her i have the yorkshire terries quide for dummies among many small breed dog books...anyway we lived in a very cold climate and a third floor apartment with only tar for a back yard so we could never take her outside because she just stood froze in the snow..my husband and i have moved three times since we had her...we tried to get her to be house broken many times took her outside and she refused to stand up and just laid in the grass..pulls her leash when attempting to control her...My dog is not aggressive at all!! shes the most timid dog I have ever met..more life a cat she doesnt bark or do anything most dogs do. our current apartment we moved into when i was six months pregnant around that time things kinda became out of control she rebelled stopped coming when called and just decided she would totally ignore me and lavish her father with attention while looking in my direction..but she doesnt take him seriously either...she gets up on our furniture even though she gets yelled and and removed everytime..we have never hit her but have scolded her..we tried to set up boundries and she overturned them...put her in pack n play..she jumped out put up baby gates to contain her messes she would jump over them..she just does as she pleases...steals our dirty underwear and eats them...chews up paper products SHE IS 4 years old!!! and seems to get worse every year!! She now pees and poops on our daughters floor in the nursery and snubs our 10 month old when she tries to get close to her..she doesnt even come to us anymore!!! and no matter what we do she just makes life difficult in a weird quiet non barking or aggressive way..also she gets very nervous and shakes and when there is a lightning storm she just pants and gasps and acts irrational or any loud noise for that matter..she runs up the stairs and through the house whenever you try to get her to come.I am again pregnant with our next child and now am fearing the constant strain she is causing our family...my heart aches at the thought of letting her go...but what can a wife, mom of two children 13 months apart under 1 yrs old and full time online student do? I think she needs some serious yorkie rehab and maybe we can no longer give her the love and serious attention she needs....i need some words of encouragement or at least some ideas as to what i should do...I am willing to try..I still have much love for her...

[YorkieChick1]

Wow, you sure do have a handful. I feel for you and can hear the frustration in your post but also the love. Have you talked to your vet about all this. Have you ever talked to a trainer also. Maybe she needs some anxiety meds too, maybe some Prozac or something. It seems like there are many things going on here and some professional help will probably be needed to help you sort out all the different negative behaviors that you need to correct. I wish you the best and hope that Lola Belle can get some help and you can get some peace.

[kjc]

Hi and Welcome to YT!

Best thing may be to get a professional trainer in to assess her and maybe work with her. You sound a little short on time, but to me it seems maybe she hasn't bonded with you and may be acting out.

I adopted a five year old that had 3-4 different owners before I got him. I thought he was more like a cat too, so I started treating him like one, just not putting a bunch of normal dog expectations on him. One thing I did do though was every evening, I made a special time to sit with him, and told him over and over what a good boy he was. When I first started doing this, I don't think he had ever heard these words before. And I had to feel it in my heart, because he could tell if I was mad at him and if I felt differently. So I made sure to clear my head, and for that moment, he was good and I had to show him that I loved him, no matter what. It took almost 8 months before he began to trust me.

Most Yorkies do get on the furniture, because they are short and can't see much from the floor. Maybe allow her one chair to get up on, might make her happy, especially if she can see out a window.

You need to find her currency. What does she like? A squeaky toy, a particular treat, meat.. whatever. Use that to train her with. Mine like Cherrios cereal, and chicken.

Take her out every 2 hours and right after meals for a potty break, or use pee pads in the house. When she goes, reward her with the treat. Do intense training with her when you have someone else at home to help with the children. Do not punish her for mistakes in the house. Yorkies don't take punishment or being yelled at well, they just get confused. Ignore mistakes and praise the things she does right. It may take a day or two but be very consistant... she'll get it eventually.

Be sure she has a spot in the house just for her. Have her bed and toys there, maybe somewhere quiet in a corner or something, where she can get away for some quiet time, when she wants.

If you have a neighbor with a nice dog, see if you can walk your dogs together, or behind the neighbor's dog. Sometimes if she can see what you want her to do, she'll pick it up quicker. Yorkies do best with harnesses as opposed to a collar. If she refuses to walk, then just sit with her outside on the leash, and move with her, until she allows you more control. Will she let you carry her? If yes and she stays calm, I'd carry her on a walk, and put her down when you're out of sight of your house and see what she does. Maybe take her to a quiet park somewhere.

It will take time, more time in the beginning and then less as she learns what you want from her. But if you don't have time to spend with her and on her, maybe rehoming would be a better option. You do have a very busy life right now, with school, and a young family and all. It may be too busy of an environment for her... she may do better in a home without children, and with an adult that does have the time and patience it will take to turn this little one around.

I hope my suggestions will help, and I wish you the best of luck, either way.

[yorkfamily]

HI really appreciate the two of you taking the time out to offer suggestions. To answer some of which I tried..Have not taken her to a new vet since we moved to upstate ny..I for the life of me cannot understand why the vet office just won't bill you and allow your dog to be cared for..its criminal!!yu have no idea walking in how much to expect to get charged..So I have yet to address her behaviors with a professional dr yet..it did call her original breeder and she claimed it was a phase..when I will tell you she acts out towards all of us..except the 10month old she gets close enough to sniff her and even lets a few gentle pets then runs away. It is a pretty quiet house regardless of the baby..she is very behaved (baby). Lola has her place in three differnt rooms of the house one is a tent by her wee wee pads that she uses some of the time : / then pees 5 inches from twice or so a day and poops..my floor is pitched so ifs fun cleaning up the stream...I kinda fear for the sanitary reasons as my 10 mnth old is cruising and crawling on the floors and I cant have lola peeing and pooping everywhere or it being dragged by shoes through our house it sends gross shivers up my spine. the living room special place is opposite where we mostly sit as a family but kinda hidden as that is what she likes in between our furniture..her bed is next to our bed..we always want her to feel like she has her own place..and her place is close to us...but she tries to dominate ours. I ingore her messes now I did learn that correction wasnt working and tell her what a good girl she is when she does it right i make it a big deal...lately that hasnt happend in so long. she wont go pee unless other dogs have gone and done their business outside..like for instance my childhood dog that lives with my mom shiz tu poo and lola..on a leash..will go in my mothers back yard but not in mine..or on a walk but near where other dogs have done their business..We have tried being the "pack leader" but have wondered if she needs another dog to associate with??? would that ease her lonliness for the 3 yrs shes been seperated from all those yorkies she grew up with?? I don't know..We can't afford a trainer right now..but like I said we live up in the farmland capital of upstate ny..not a whole lot of trainers and dog specialist here..most of our vets are trained to take care of cows and horses and barn animals. I have come to terms that Lola isnt dog like..in most perspectives..I just wish she was giving the love back that we show her..its been 3 1/2 years now!!! it seems to be getting worse..she doesnt like toys or treats..weird I know..but thats why I found this forum..like i said she likes underwear and bras and socks and tissues and toilet paper...but we have sooo many toys she just refuses to play with. She does however go after toys that other dogs have slobbered on..I wonder if she has species confusion?? If we DO decide she no longer fits into our family...where do we go from there?? I can't just give her to any person that says they would take care of her and her "special" personality..it would give me gray hair because I know how difficult she can be and only a mommys love can make exceptions for that ya know? I just dont who I should turn to for a loving home for her...thanks again everyone

[snowie]

Is the pee pad she is peeing close to but not on it used? My maltese will only use a pee pad twice then she wants a new one. That includes if another dog uses it. She will then pee/poo beside it.

Maybe you can put up a baby gate (or something else to keep her out of the room) of some kind in front of your babies room so the dog can not get in there?

You can buy a cloth dog diaper to put on her. Most pet stores sell them for dogs or you can buy them at petedge.com

[daniellealberta]

It sounds like this little one has had no chance to get settled (not your fault, it sounds like life got in the way!), but from reading your post, in the 2 1/2 years you've had her, you've moved three times, (she's moved four times if you count when she first came to you), and you've had two babies, which also disrupts any routine you might have had.

I would say start at the beginning. Pretend she is a brand new puppy and start establishing a proper routine for her, just like you probably do with your children. Feed her, walk her, and kennel her at the same times everyday. That should hopefully be a good start. If you can establish a good routine before your next baby arrives, hopefully you'll be able to carry on with it after the baby is born.

They are never too old to learn, but it sounds like this little one's life has been one big change after another. It sounds like you love her a lot. Good luck.

[MyBabyFynnlie]

It definitely sounds like you've got your hands full and I wish you the best of luck.

From my experience with dogs - in general - they don't take well to being yelled at. Most of the time, they get confused or frustrated, which is not what you want.

Try setting up a place that is just for her and spending a few minutes just you with her. Even if that means going into the bathroom and closing the door. But as long as it's you and her. It sounds like she's been busstled around so much, she's probably just trying to get attention, even if it is the wrong kind.

Good luck and I hope you can work things out with her!

[Roccosmommy]

Originally Posted by daniellealberta

It sounds like this little one has had no chance to get settled (not your fault, it sounds like life got in the way!), but from reading your post, in the 2 1/2 years you've had her, you've moved three times, (she's moved four times if you count when she first came to you), and you've had two babies, which also disrupts any routine you might have had.

I would say start at the beginning. Pretend she is a brand new puppy and start establishing a proper routine for her, just like you probably do with your children. Feed her, walk her, and kennel her at the same times everyday. That should hopefully be a good start. If you can establish a good routine before your next baby arrives, hopefully you'll be able to carry on with it after the baby is born.

They are never too old to learn, but it sounds like this little one's life has been one big change after another. It sounds like you love her a lot. Good luck.

Excellent idea. To me, it sounds like she may be confused with her role and her insecurity may be coming from her needing an "alpha" to be in command (the addition of children may have further confused her place in the 'pack'). Small things, like eating first (or eating from her bowl), always leading when walking out the door, etc. can help accomplish this. Along with establishing a routine, re-establishing yourself as the alpha may give a comfort level that will allow her to relax, know her place and not act out. I sincerely hope it works out for all of you.

[kjc]

Just some more questions: How does she react when she hears other dogs on the TV?

Can you bring another dog over to 'scent' your yard for her? Or they sell a scented 'Pee post' at Petsmart and online too. When she pees next to a pee pad, scent the pad with a bit of her pee, maybe that would entice her to use it. Maybe put two pads down to make the area bigger. Also scent your yard with some of her poop too.

As confining her doesn't work, try closing off areas you want her to stay out of. Close the bedroom doors (use baby monitors).

Off the top of my head... I wonder if she's sensitive to your hormones from being pregnant. It really sounds like she is marking areas.... the baby's room, and just off the pee pads may be intentional... her attempt to own things. And the underware.... My pup did that ... I had to get a hamper for inside a closet then put a hook on the door so she couldn't open it, and get the undies out.

I would give her some used socks knotted for her to play with, and a worn T shirt in her bed to see if it helps her any.

Also, I wonder if she has a hormonal imbalance? My intact female is a gem, until she comes in season, then she doesn't even know me. Then she's okay again when it ends.

Maybe just a teeny tiny bit or Vicks Vapo rub on her nostrils... again to see if it has any effect on her behavior. Only use a very little bit, just enough to make your finger look wet. Not good to use on a daily basis! Can be toxic.

Take some of her toys and let another dog use them for a week or so, then return them to her.

Have you tried letting her sleep with you in your bed? This is one thing that can really help bonding, and if she is missing littermates it may help. Sounds like she may have issues with bonding which can happen from being caged too long. As affectionate as Yorkies are... this is just heartbreaking to hear.

Also sounds like you had her going there for a while, she was following you. Then something happened to cause her to act out. I agree with the above poster... wipe the slate clean and start all over with her. Mostly, forgive her. If you can't allow her on the furniture, have her in your lap... at least after the kids are in bed.

My boy totally freaked one day. I picked up his bed to wash it. He went to lay in it, and it was gone! He panicked. I had to hold him till it was dry. He thought he was getiing kicked out... again. It's very sad what they learn from their experiences, the things they hold on to. So now he has at least two beds!


And your last question: Research Yorkie rescues in your area... or find the closest one. If none, then some will travel to pick her up, train her and find her a good home with people who can handle and are aware of her problems. There's a few on this forum you can contact whenever you are ready....

[DvlshAngel985]

Originally Posted by daniellealberta

It sounds like this little one has had no chance to get settled (not your fault, it sounds like life got in the way!), but from reading your post, in the 2 1/2 years you've had her, you've moved three times, (she's moved four times if you count when she first came to you), and you've had two babies, which also disrupts any routine you might have had.

I would say start at the beginning. Pretend she is a brand new puppy and start establishing a proper routine for her, just like you probably do with your children. Feed her, walk her, and kennel her at the same times everyday. That should hopefully be a good start. If you can establish a good routine before your next baby arrives, hopefully you'll be able to carry on with it after the baby is born.

They are never too old to learn, but it sounds like this little one's life has been one big change after another. It sounds like you love her a lot. Good luck.

I wholeheartedly agree with this. OP, it seems that your little girl had been through many stresses in her little life before she came to live with you. If I understood correctly, you've had her for 3 years, yes? In three years she's come to know 3 different homes. The moving process is very stressful for a yorkie. To make any move, or any change easier on them, keep a routine. Always take her out at the exact same times, always feed her at the exact same times, and always take 15 mins to do simple obedience training with her at the end of the day. Like Daniellealberta said, start over with her as if she was a new puppy. Confine her and only give her free roam when she has earned it. I personally wouldn't use a kennel. I'd use an ex-pen with all her things in it, in that place that would be just for her. Since she's a jumper, try something like this.
Amazon.com: Pink Grid Pet Tent Exercise Pen...

[Roccosmommy]

Originally Posted by kjc

My boy totally freaked one day. I picked up his bed to wash it. He went to lay in it, and it was gone! He panicked. I had to hold him till it was dry. He thought he was getiing kicked out... again. It's very sad what they learn from their experiences, the things they hold on to. So now he has at least two beds!

Aw, that is so sad! Just goes to show how sensitive and perceptive these little yorkies are...I'm learning that more and more each day.